Distancing is distancing whether it is in the city or in the woods. Like the rest of the world this week I‘ve been information overloading. So it’s with a heavy heart that I’m postponing the playing in Sawpit Woods for now.
My week started with a hangover from the last party I’ll have in a while. It was a lot of fun. Then my laptop (which is nearly as much of a lifeline as the woods are to me- died) So it was log piling rather than stock piling that kept me busy. I ran out of oil and a week later I’m still in the cold.
I’m very grateful for the logs from the woods here. I’m very grateful for the wonderful FSC for teaching me to axe as a child. I’m very grateful for the physical exercise. I’m very grateful for the space I have. I’m very grateful for the job I have.
Its been an emotional week at work and at home. The end of the week teachering was a bit of a numb feeling. I’m expecting it to take a bit of time to sink in. I tried to lead an assembly with 10 seconds notice. It was possibly the last one of the year. Not my finest hour. The sound and feeling of the whole school community singing led me to tears and my first glimpse of a new reality.
I had a rare argument with my eldest girl child about social distancing. I read about and remembered the importance of your peers during the teenage years. I saw great strength in the younger girl, as she compromised her day for her sister.
I took a deep breath and acknowledged that parenting continues to be challenging no matter how long you’ve been doing it.
I saw a boy child’s reality switch in a day. He went to his possible last day of school ever. From working as hard as he’s ever going to, to nothing... no school, no study, no job. I had rising emotions as he picked up a guitar for the first time and taught himself a tune out of nowhere in the space of a morning. Children are truly brilliant. I had imagined his last day of school would feel like he looks in the picture below... but I’m not sure it was quite like that.
The emotional girl child went on to cook a delicious meal for all, as I worked late for other children. She then proceeded to spend hours homeworking and painting. I remembered how mindful the practice of creating is. I feel grateful that she’s so engaged.
The other daughter taught me the Tik Tok ‘renegade’, then made pancakes and a cake. We sung a happy birthday to an amazing 12 year old kid. She’s locked down in Spain. It suddenly feels an awfully long way away. I noticed how quiet the skies are here tonight.
And so...as another week comes to an end, I’m going to be grateful for all I‘ve got. And I think I’m gonna need some hand cream. Although the children are socially distant from me this week, they’ve shown me, yet again, how great (not so small) people are. They can be calm, rational, self-reliant, silly, flippant, emotional, lucid, lovely and hardworking. They can be everything they want to be, even if it is at a distance.
Blue skies will be in their way over the horizon soon enough.